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| Hanging out with Buggs and Wile E. |
Early in the summer of 2024, a friend of mine expressed an interest in getting a season pass to Splashtown and suggested I do so as well. As fun as that sounded, I hadn’t been to a water park since my senior year in high school. That was in 1986, when our senior class took a school-sponsored end of year day off to bob, slide, and swim.
Splashtown is a water park in Spring, a Houston suburb north of the city, and only six miles from my front door. At some point, the Six Flags corporation bought, or became overseers of Splashtown, but like early Christians converted Pagans more easily by incorporating their traditions, Six Flags Hurricane Harbor retained Splashtown in the name. It helps ease confusion.
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| An old map of Astroworld |
I haven’t had a Six Flags season pass since college. That’s when Astroworld was still a thing. For those of you not in the know, Astroworld was a park among parks when it came to theme parks and roller coasters. It opened the summer after my birth on 57 acres across the freeway from the Eighth Wonder of the World, the Houston Astrodome. It was wonderful when after classes, with an afternoon free, I could drive ten minutes away and catch a few rides, even if just for a few hours.
Astroworld wasn’t the first theme park in America in 1968. Six Flags over Texas opened in August, 1961, and then Disney World opened later, in October, 1971. Astroworld introduced many firsts, such as Thunder River, the first successful river rapids ride, and the Alpine Sleigh Ride, which blew refrigerated air of only ten degrees over guests, making it the first of it’s kind. Astroworld was also the first park to house a Water World on property.
Other Astroworld firsts: Six Flags park to be purchased and not built, double-armed Ferris wheel (Astrowheel), first successful suspended-swinging coaster (XLR8), and world's tallest looping ride (SWAT). And one fun fact greatly unknown to most is that the bridge crossing the 610 freeway from the parking lot to the park, was the only privately-owned bridge with public access to cross an interstate highway.
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| Overview photo of Astroworld towards the end |
Astroworld had the largest outdoor air conditioned system in the world, venting 2,400 tons of cool air in shaded areas, where patrons waited in line for rides in the dreaded heat and humidity of Houston summers. Six Flags took control in 1975, the year they opened the Texas Cyclone, a high-speed wooden roller coaster modeled after the one at Coney Island. I was at the park for the grand opening and rode it the first day it was open to the public. It was a mean coaster.
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| Posing with ex Astroworld security employees |
I loved the many hours spent working at the park back stage. It’s where I met Jimmy Buffet, and was invited to drink leftover 'ritas from a row of his Margarita machines. I also had a conversation with Mark Knoffler of Dire Straights about fireworks just before he took stage. At Fright Fest, I worked security at a stage at the base of the AstroNeedle for a magic show. I saw that show so often I figured out all of his tricks. Fun fact on the AstroNeedle, as the tallest ride in the park, when it opened under the name Skyrama, it was one of the tallest rides in the world. And learning about the employee cafeteria changed my life when going to the park as a patron, for the money saved on food.
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| A stylized image of the Astrodomain I created |
Six Flags Astroworld died in 2005, citing performance issues and parking conflicts with the Texan's football team. It was closed and immediately demolished. The board, in turn, instantly fired the man who did this, but there was no turning back. They tried to reverse the deal he made to sell the land to no avail. After expecting upwards of $150 million, and after spending $20 million for demolition, only $77 million was received.
Nineteen years later, the land that was supposed to earn more profit as a shopping center is still vacant. It’s used as a parking lot during the Houston Rodeo, lauded as the largest rodeo in the world. And now Houston, the 4th largest city in the US, has no major theme park.
So at the suggestion of obtaining a season pass, broke as I was, I saw it as a great opportunity for therapy, as I continue to recover from the debilitating effects of long-COVID. To spend money on a pass would get me out of the house and into the sun, offer a chance to have fun, and socialize with people. They offered a free upgrade to the top tier Diamond level for $90, and it’s valid at all parks in the Six Flags family. I could go to any park as often as I desired; it was a bargain, and paid for itself after 3 visits. For another $120, I could also have 2 meals a day every time I visit any of the parks. Even parking and an all you can drink cup was part of the deal.
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As a newly appointed board member of my local water district, I was to attend a conference in Fort Worth, Texas. Six Flags over Texas, the original theme park, is in Arlington, a city between Ft. Worth and Dallas. I used to go often when I was a kid. It’s where I saw Duran Duran, one of my favorite bands in 1986, the year I graduated high school in Dallas. A trip to Six Flags would certainly add more value to my 2024 season pass. Oh, and there is a Hurricane Harbor park across the highway to explore as well.
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| From the Oil Derrick looking East |
When I discovered how light the park attendance was scheduled to be the Wednesday preceding the conference, I chose to leave a day early. Traffic north on I-45 was a breeze, leaving the house at 7AM. I was at the park at 10:20, and parked on the first row, mere feet from the entrance. I rode 29 rides that day, enjoying 8 rides on the Mr. Freeze, 5 on Batman the Ride, and 3 on Titan (more on this below). For lunch I enjoyed a sliced brisket sandwich with waffle fries. At dinner I ordered two tacos, barbacoa and shredded chicken. Deeee-lish!
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| Tacos were delish on flour tortillas |
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| The view from my hotel room of the park |
The first function of the conference wasn’t until 5:30 PM Thursday. I spent all day Wednesday and returned Thursday, leaving the park at 3:30PM, to check into the conference hotel room and shower. My mileage to Dallas was paid for and the meals were included. There was no money involved in getting into the park, and the two meals a day covered my lunch and dinner. The only expense was for hotels on the nights that didn’t include the conference. I found a hotel across from the park with a great view of the Judge Roy Scream roller coaster for $45 a night, which included breakfast. During my week in North Texas I spent zero dollars on meals.
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| The view from my Omni hotel room in Ft. Worth |
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| The hero that I am |
Sunday began by riding Titan 8 times. Even the ride operators were stunned that I just kept going. I finally stopped because my body demanded it. With my hands in the air, I braced myself by spreading me knees apart. That innocent combination on the 2nd plunge tweaked my back and caused a great deal of pain. I slowly pried myself out of the car, and left with a pained smile and a wave. I spent much of the rest of Sunday riding easier rides, like going up the Oil Derrick, spinning on the Sidewinder, and riding the train. Before closing, I was finally feeling well enough to ride the New Texas Giant 5 times.
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| Scrambler, Aquaman, and Sky Screamer |
Monday I chose to check out Hurricane Harbor (HH). In all, I prefer Splashtown (ST), however, there were things HH did better. Their Diamond reserved seating area is FAR superior to ours at ST. In Arlington, the area is shaded by a large tent on a raised island in the middle of a large wading pool. It was great to have such a nice area to sit and keep my things. I napped for nearly an hour that afternoon. Around the island is a waterfall into the wading pool, and behind the waterfall is a bench. I went down and sat behind the waterfall in the shade. They also had a really cool ride called the Black Hole, but the line after opening grew to over an hour, so I only rode it once.
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| The Oasis, for Diamond Pass members |
In fact, Monday at HH was horrible because everyone was there. I guess they heard I would be there. The lines were long on all the rides. I was glad I got there at opening and was able to ride things before the lines got too bad.
The other things better about HH, though: the food is superior overall, but the fries at ST are better. Their racer has more turns, so I liked that, but their ride pads were thinner and thus I only rode twice, because when hitting the water at the bottom of the hill, I hurt my knee and junk. ST also has a higher and steeper slide, and our winding lazy river has shade, where HH is just a square-ish river with no shade at all. And HH allows swimmers to hold onto the side of the wave pool and go literally 2 feet from the back wall. Swimmers at ST aren’t allowed to hold onto the sides, and the rope keeps people at least 20 feet from the back wall.
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| The Black Hole ride |
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| Tasty pizza and garlic knots |
The food at both Six Flags (6F) was also superior to ST. Their pizza comes with garlic knots that were heavenly, and marinara for dipping. Ours just comes with fries. The tacos were great, until suddenly on 2nd Wednesday they switched to corn tortillas. At ST, they started with corn and switched to flour after the complaints. 6F had great BBQ beef sandwiches, pulled pork, great nachos, wonderful chili cheese and bacon hot dogs, and a decent Buffalo chicken sandwich, which they called a Nashville hot chicken sandwich. Last time I checked, Nashville was nowhere near Buffalo. I never tried a burger at 6F, even though there was a Johnny Rockets. Had I not had a burger for dinner on Tuesday, I might have had one on 2nd Wednesday.
While in Fort Worth I took advantage of my conference ending at 2PM Saturday to visit the Ft. Worth Stockyards. It was miserable with the number of tourists and the heat. I hoped to catch a train ride along the Trinity River, but they were sold out for the day. My visit to Billy Bob’s, the world’s largest honky tonk, was only brief enough to say I was there. I would have stayed to see the evening Rodeo, but my fatigue kicked in, causing me to return to my hotel to rest. I then enjoyed a swim in the Omni hotel’s rooftop pool as the sun set.
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| At Billy Bob's |
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| The tourists watch the cattle round up |
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| The train I had hoped to ride |
I didn’t lose them on any of the roller coasters, but what blew my socks off was that both parks were closed Tuesdays. And Six Flags Over Texas closed at 7PM during the week, 8PM on Sunday. When I was a kid, I remember the thrill of riding coasters at night, which was a whole new experience. There were fireworks each night, too. I guess they are saving a lot of money by shaving off nearly 20 hours a week and not having to buy all those fireworks.
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| Fort Worth Water Gardens |
Fortunately I have a dear friend in Dallas, Leta. She was nursing a shoulder after surgery, so while the parks rested, I spent the day with her. Leta’s husband cooked burgers and I got to see her sister, Beth. I always love visiting Leta. She was my teacher in high school, and became my advisor when I got into student politics. Now that Mom is gone, she says she’s my surrogate mother, and I’m fine with that.
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| Yee Haw! |
The huge crowds and heat on 2nd Wednesday had me feeling ready to leave at 4PM. I managed 26 rides, and after the hour it took to get dinner, I walked out of the park just before 6PM. After an hour on the road, I had to pull over in a rest stop south of Corsicana to nap for an hour. Fatigue is real, folks. I got home just after 10PM.
It was a great week catching up on the last 24 years of my life spent without riding roller coasters. My passion was awakened last year at the rodeo, when I rode a few thrill rides there, but they were nothing like those at 6F. I felt like a teenager again, until my body reminded me that I am in my fifties. Narrowing down my favorite ride is difficult, but I think it would have to be the New Texas Giant, followed by Titan and Mr. Freeze, with Superman and Batman the Ride bringing up the rear. I learned a lot at my conference, enjoyed time with Leta, and loved spending a week--as the Astroworld ads used to say--in a wonderful world of fun.
The stats:
Six Flags over Texas: 4 days- June 12, 13, 16, & 18 = 29 hours
Hurricane Harbor: 1 day- June 17= 7 hours
Hotel stays: Omni Fort Worth, Sleep Inn Arlington
Miles driven: 441
Ya-hoos: 42
Yee-haws: 35
I'mma dies: 2
I remember this': 18
My favorite rides:
New Texas Giant- 16 times. A 1990 ride revamped in 2011. The new version is a vast improvement, making it a hybrid wooden/steel coaster. It climbs 153 feet and drops 147, at 79 degrees. It goes 65 mph, and has over-banked turns ranging from 90-115 degrees. Awesome AF.
Giant's front car
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| The Giant from above |
Titan- 11 times. This beast drops 255 feet at a speed of 85 mph. It was the tallest and fastest in Texas when it opened in 2001, and became one of the top 10 coasters in the US. I wish I’d ridden it more, but there were often lines, and it was a long walk. Had my back not gone wonky, I would have ridden at least 5 more times.
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| Titan and the stadiums beyond the parking lot |
Mr. Freeze- 16 times. This beautiful ride launches to 70 mph in under 4 seconds, climbs to 218 feet and drops 194 before retracing the track backwards. It opened in 1998, but was planned to open with the 1997 release of Batman and Robin, with Arnold Schwarzenegger and George Clooney scheduled to open and be the first to ride it. Lunch problems delayed the opening to the 1998 season. I’m not sure what Arnie and George rode instead.
Batman the Ride Batman the Ride- 8 times. This inverted coasted wowed me with 2 loops and 2 cork screws. It’s an inverted coaster, debuting in 1992, when awarded Coaster Landmark status. It has a G-force of 4, which is probably why I didn’t ride it more than 8 times; it was also rough on my ears, hitting the safety bars. As fun as it was, it was rough on the mind. It has an 85 foot drop at a speed of 50 mph and inverts 5 times.
Superman Tower of Power- 9 times. I don’t like drop rides and didn’t even attempt to ride this on 1st Wednesday. I regret that. This magnificent ride could actually be my second favorite. It’s certainly great on a hot afternoon for the amount of breeze you enjoy as you shoot 177 feet into the air at 55 miles per hour. There is then a moment of weightlessness before falling halfway down, and bouncing a few times. The ride then lifts to the top of the tower. The brakes release for a 2nd moment of weightlessness, and it drops for a few more bounces before bringing you down to the ground. The views are breathtaking; you can see both downtowns of Dallas and Fort Worth. I could have ridden another 9 times were it not for the long lines.
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| Superman in action |
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| Superman blast-off |
Rides I rode one time:
Pirates of Speelunker’s Cave, only because of my back, but it was fun, despite the annoying music.
On the Bamboo Shoot with a date in the 80s El Aserradero, the original and first log ride. It was broken down during much of my time there. I’m glad I rode it Sunday- it was closed 2nd Wednesday, and the line was long on Thursday. I don’t know why they gave it such a complicated name. Everyone called it the Log Ride, and at Astroworld (AW) it was the Bamboo Shoot.
Dino Off Road Adventure, which shocked me because they wouldn’t allow me to ride alone. I wound up meeting the nicest woman who rode in back with me, while her college-age son drove. It wasn’t off-road, by the way, but it was reminiscent of the old cars at Astroworld. The dinosaur animatronics were fun.
Silver Star Carousel, because why not? It was too crowded 2nd Wed to do much else.
El Sombrero, which was the Wagon Wheel at AW, and was one of my favorite rides as a kid.
La Vibora, which always had a long ride, but I didn’t like it. It beat me up and didn’t offer as much fun as other rides.
El Diablo, once was enough. I love going upside down, but not just sitting there upside down.
Roaring rapids, were boring, but I met a nice guy from Texas who had never seen the beach and wanted to hear my advice on visiting Texas Beaches.
- Runaway Mine Train, brought back memories of riding this steel coaster, built in 1966, and the park’s oldest coaster, with my cousin Leslie as kids. Her parents took us once, and even though we lived 45 minutes away, we spent the night in a hotel across the highway and had so much fun. I remember naming a section of 6F, with its stretch of sunny blacktop, “Steambath Path.” It’s still there, too.
Judge Roy Scream, which is a rough ride and beat me up. Once was enough. And I knew it was going to be a rough ride. I only rode it to say I had.
Judge Roy Scream at sunset from my hotel
Runaway Mountain, which was annoying not being able to see where the coaster was going, and I’m fairly certain it was the same as AW’s Mayan Mindbender.
Other rides I enjoyed:
Catwoman Whip- 3 times. I used to know this as the Spinnaker. I absolutely love the circular motion taking a rider around and up until you are going upside down over and again. I can practically fall asleep on this ride.
Shock Wave- 6 times. I remember when this ride opened in 1978 as the tallest roller coaster in the world, and the first with two back-to-back loops. I could have ridden more, but it had me sitting in the sun longer than I liked, waiting for the other train to load. It has a G-force of 5.9, and hits speeds of 60 mph. The manner in which the track rocks is also a little unnerving.
The Railroad- 5 times. One thing I remember riding with Mom at AW was the train that circled the park. It’s the same experience at 6F, and some of the props are the same from the 80s, like the ghost town with dancing skeletons. It came in handy when my back gave out, and when I got tired of walking across the park at the end of the week. This was an actual train built in PA in the 1800s to work on sugar plantations.
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| All aboard the #2 |
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| Sky Screamer behind Aquaman |
- Texas Sky Screamer- 2 times. I liked this ride, but this was the only time I actually got scared. It earned the Guinness world record as the world’s tallest swing carousel. The rider is lifted 400 feet and swung around at over 40 mph. It was also great for cooling down, especially after getting drenched on Aquaman. But on my 2nd ride, it was windy and I kept twisting counter clockwise, and something about that scared me. Was I going to twist 180 degrees? And that might cause my swing to shoot off, landing somewhere on the other side of Dallas. I’ll ride again when it’s not windy.
Aquaman Power Wave- 2 times. This was a great ride, but you get drenched. I mean d-r-e-enched...to where there was a puddle of water an inch deep between the lap bar and me. I might as well have walked into the swimming pool. It was among the top 10 most anticipated rides for the 2020 season. It’s a short track and you ride backward, forward, back, forward, splash, and done. It reaches a max speed of 62 mph on a 709 foot track with 90 degree angles at each end. Splashing into the water that floods the pool on the last forward fall helps slow the car down. There is no dry section on this ride. You will get soaked. You have been warned. But a great ride it was.
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| Huge splash |
Pandemonium- twice. It was my first and last ride. I almost didn’t get to ride it the 2nd time because it had closed for maintenance. I took a chance and waited in the line forming in the lane. It opened after a 10 minute wait, with half the people giving up and leaving the line. Five minutes later, I was in a car swinging around 360 degrees, while the car navigated a track at 31 mph with a drop of 27 feet. It was a fun ride, but the line was always long.
Gunslinger-
twice. Another classic from when I was a kid. I love going around on
swings. This one didn’t go 400 feet into the air, so wasn’t at
all scary. It was soothing.
The Joker- twice. Another great ride that is tough to endure and always had a long line. It spins while the car travels a short tack of 1,019 feet. It drops 54 feet at 38 mph, and also had long waits.
The Joker
Riddler The Riddler- twice. This is another ride I could have done more often, but when it came down to this or Batman/Mr. Freeze, those won out. I didn’t plan to ride Mr. Freeze 7 times in a row in the final hour on 1st Wednesday, but there was no line, so I just kept going, and never made it over to Riddler as planned. It’s another lovely swinging ride.
Sidewinder- 3 times. This classic ride is probably as old as I am, giving me visions of flying off the contraption and landing somewhere in the parking lot. (It's actually older, introduced in 1961.) It was perfect while my aching back recovered. And fun.
The Oil Derrick- twice. Is anything more iconic to the 6F skyline than this orange tower with views from 300 feet in the air, opening in 1969? After riding up the elevator, you can remain as long as you like. I remember when you could slide on burlap sacks from the 1st platform, which were removed in 1976. I chose this ride when trying to dry off after Aquaman. My 2nd visit was the Wednesday that everyone was at 6F with me. Everyone. But I was practically alone up there.
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| View from the Oil Derrick |
Justice League- twice. Riders travel through Metropolis and shoot digital targets on large 3D screens while twisting and turning through various rooms. You get so engaged in trying to shoot the targets that you start to not notice what a fun ride it is.
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| Drenched outside the Hall of Justice |
Penguin’s tips:
Get to the parking lot around 10:15AM, when they open the entrance on Six Flags Dr. They will open multiple lanes into the lot, so don’t be greedy. Allow other cars to merge if their lane doesn’t open when yours does, and they freak out and want in your lane. They don’t all open at once, and there is enough prime parking prior to 11AM that you don’t need to worry with freaking out if you let others in front of you and being rude.
Don’t bother lining up at the entrance gate before they open at 10:45. The park doesn’t open until 11AM, so you’ll just be standing around by the fountain. I sat in my car and then in the shade. After passing security, move to the shortest line, especially if there are two people scanning tickets; move around the first scanner and get in quicker.
Once inside, before 11AM, most people gather to the right, which leads to Gotham. On slower days, you can ride Mr. Freeze multiple times and still get over to Batman next, and only have to wait 5 minutes. If you want Titan and Giant first, go wait on the left side, near the shop.
While you wait for the rope to lower, there is one place open for drinks and snacks and a shop. This is a good time to explore the shop. If going to the left, they usually opened the shop door before the rope lowered, if you are in such a rush and need to be first.
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| The Batmobile in Gotham |
I don’t know why people rush so fast when they lower the ropes to allow people into the park at 11. There are no prizes for being first to ride any of the rides, and everyone isn’t going to the same ride as you. Slow down and stop pressing between others. It’s just rude.
There was one place in the whole park that I could find, and I looked, where you can refill your own cups. That is Texas Tacos (13 on the map, in the Texas section, next to Cinnabon). Here is where you’ll find one of the machines you can select all sorts of flavors. I discovered the sugar-free lemonades, but by Sunday they had run out and were not refilled prior to Wednesday. But I enjoyed the orange flavored diet Coke. You can’t get those flavors anywhere else in the park. I didn't see any of these machines at HH.
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| Superman, Mr. Freeze, Batman, Joker, Riddler, Sky Screamer, Aquaman and more |
There are only 3 places I found where you can sit inside air conditioned dining rooms. Boomtown’s All American Cafe (#5 on the map), which was always packed, and Johnny Rocket’s (11 in Gotham) which is also always packed. Then there is JBs Smokehouse BBQ (7 in Texas section). This is where you want to go. Even on crowded 2nd Wednesday, it was THE place to dine. Go to the back section. It’s cooler than the front and not well known. And look up at the air vents. Sit yourself under one of these vents and in minutes you’ll be transported to a lovely state of mind, as your sweat and misery dries up. You don’t have to order food there, either. Bring in your tacos, nachos, hot dogs, et. al. and enjoy the coolness.
If you want to ride over and over again and aren’t solo, consider splitting up. When a ride is over, they will allow you to fill any open seats instead of exiting, as long as you do so quickly. Often, there are only single seats open. There were times I’d be in a car pulling back into the station, and there was a single rider. I’d simply ask if I could go again, and no one ever said no. There were many times I had to leave my car and move to another. Going solo was a great experience for me, because it allowed me to do what I wanted when I wanted. Like riding a ride 8 times in a row.
Meals are going to cost you at least $17 each, not including drinks. If you don’t have the 2 a day meal plan, buy the meal deal for $22 and get 1 meal, 1 snack and a drink. Upgrade to the all you can drink cup. It’s well worth it.
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| Diamond Club wrist band for Hurricane Harbor |
Don’t trust on-line crowd calendars, especially queue times dot com. 12% my ass. Even the day before, that’s what it was forecasting for park attendance. When I looked after getting home, it showed it had been 74%. I should have known something was off when it forecasted the Tuesdays they were closed. Also, ride wait times 6F advertises were never accurate. They may give a general feel for how long a wait is, but it’s never what they broadcast, and they always err in their favor.
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